Agony
I have realised, prose for me is clarity and poetry is a list of questions brimming from confusion. But often, the right is wrong and the wrong is right — so we need not be wise to choose, but just jump at the first or final cue.
How much, of this little or large world, do I own?
How many of my decisions, are actually mine?
Do I have a significance in this world…who or what am I living for…and what is it that I intend to do?
These were some questions, that used to bug me, as a child.
I would look outside, and think, what would it be like, looking at myself, not in a mirror?
Who am I?
And why am I here?
What purpose do I serve?
Are some piled questions that bug me today.
It is uncomfortable being a cog in the wheel.
And equally uncomfortable, being in the glare of the spotlight.
Safety and risk are two sides of a coin
But as I write I realise — R comes before S
Hence Safety comes at a cost of Risk.
I have my answer today.
Playing safe has gotten me nowhere.
Last year, I lept out of my comfort
Did not think a second before, how what will happen.
And I survived.
Yes, I will regret and yes, I will miss the safety.
But R comes before S
and Risk, has to come now, after the long peace of stability.
I cannot be exceptional, hiding behind for the mercy of a sweet talker
Because they carry daggers — why do idioms make sense so suddenly?
99 good deeds and one mistake, stitch in time saves 9
Now is the time, when I must do what is clearly right
There is no second choice.
You left home abruptly, to them it was abrupt.
But you knew, this was slowly in the making.
There is really no point to prove, because for those who want to see you fall — you are already fallen.
So rise, or walk, survive, or thrive — people will see what they have to.
They will choose what to see and what not to.
A small praise observed should have cautioned of a small mistake remembered over time.
The one who talks of others, talks of you behind your back
Alas, I had to burn before realising fire heats and burns
No amount of secondary learning or intuition could save me.
Still weigh, what matters to you, and yes
Objects seem farther than they appear
Life seems like one decision and changed in a flick
But who knew, you’d be back in your nest
All you need for them is to build it without you
Or wait for you to come enhance it.
Leave the nest, before they call you an afternoon sleeper.
Leave the nest, now.
